美國本科留學(xué)申請：ACT文章寫作實(shí)例解析

ACT考試全稱“American College Testing”，中文名稱為“美國大學(xué)入學(xué)考試”，是美國大學(xué)本科的入學(xué)條件之一，也是獎(jiǎng)學(xué)金發(fā)放的重要依據(jù)之一。

考試共215道�？偡�36分，考試時(shí)間共175分鐘。英語 75問題/45分鐘。數(shù)學(xué) 60問題/60分鐘。閱讀 40問題/35分鐘。科學(xué) 40問題/35分鐘。還有一個(gè)寫作(選做)。

ACT考試官方改革后的寫作部分，推出了新樣題及評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)。新的評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)由4項(xiàng)指標(biāo)組成：

1.觀點(diǎn)及分析Ideas and Analysis

2.對觀點(diǎn)從深度和廣度上的支撐 Development and Support

3.文章結(jié)構(gòu)Organization 【ACT寫作部分咨詢】

4.語言運(yùn)用Language Use

4項(xiàng)分別判分，寫作的最后得分是這四項(xiàng)的綜合分。

一、開篇分析：

I 篇首段：

It is no secret that today’s workforce no longer consists entirely of people. Rather, machines are being developed to complete many of the tasks which humans have traditionally done. This can greatly increase productivity and efficiency of simple, repetitive tasks. Many people view this as a great positive and point out that it leads to a more uniform and less expensive product which is better for everyone. However, some people are more wary of this popular trend of automating the workforce and question whether this progress is truely (并非筆誤，是樣文的真實(shí)重現(xiàn)) positive. Their concerns, though, are outweighed by the benefits these machines offer. (108字)

首段解析：第一篇文章的首段行文很穩(wěn)，It is no secret that…句型展開，到Rather引領(lǐng)，寫作的層次邏輯感清晰可見。然后They can…陳述事實(shí)，Many people句描述一般民眾對智能機(jī)械的正向認(rèn)識(shí)，However句展示一部分民眾持有的疑惑和擔(dān)憂(負(fù)面的認(rèn)識(shí))，最后一句用though拉回來，用了一個(gè)表權(quán)衡的短語 are outweighed by …指出智能機(jī)械的益處勝于民眾的擔(dān)憂。 【寫作要求】

II 篇首段：

Advances in technology have become so widely accepted in today’s culture that very few people are willing to pause to consider the consequences. People get so excited about what new technologies can offer that they forget to question whether there might be any negative effects. Without caution and deliberation, replacing the natural with the mechanical would undoubtedly be disasterous.(注：并非筆誤，是樣文的真實(shí)重現(xiàn))(63字)

首段解析：第二篇文章的首段先用一個(gè)so…that…句型說明技術(shù)的進(jìn)步被廣泛接受以至于人們都不愿停下細(xì)想其后果，第二句再用so…that…句型描述人們過于熱衷新技術(shù)都忘了考慮其負(fù)面效應(yīng)。兩個(gè)句子一個(gè)從技術(shù)層面引入，一個(gè)從民眾層面分析，雖都用了so…that…句型，但氣勢愈強(qiáng)，程度愈深到結(jié)尾句，作者亮明自己的觀點(diǎn)，如果沒有仔細(xì)思慮和考量，以機(jī)械代替人力將毫無疑問是災(zāi)難性的。作者在亮明自己的觀點(diǎn)是用了兩個(gè)很強(qiáng)勢的詞undoubtedly 和disastrous, 不過前面有without引導(dǎo)的條件短語鋪墊，顯得作者的觀點(diǎn)不片面，不極端。

小結(jié)：從論述文的角度來看，第二篇第一段(63字)亮明自己的觀點(diǎn)非常鮮明，直接了當(dāng)。而第一篇第一段(108字)更像是一個(gè)論文綜述，分析了正反兩方面的態(tài)勢，最后也沒能開門見山，旗幟鮮明的表明自己的觀點(diǎn)，雖然篇幅更長，用詞更多，但仍不及第二篇首段更有力度。

二、結(jié)尾分析：

I 篇末段：

Whether humans like it or not, machines are becoming more and popular (原文中就忘寫了一個(gè)more)in the workplace and are decreasing the need for humans to work those jobs. This can lead to advancement of society, a greater end product or service, and even a lower consumer cost of goods. Many people are frightened of change, but unfortunately for them, the past is gone and now we must look to the future.

末段解析：首句強(qiáng)勢表明觀點(diǎn)，無論人類喜歡與否，機(jī)器都會(huì)變得越來越普遍，降低成本，提高效率。最后一句呼吁害怕改變的人們能面向未來。 【如何寫好末段】

II 篇末段：

Decreasing the speed with which we incorporate mechanical influence is important because of the potential dangers that lurk in blind acceptance. Not only does the preference of the mechanical over the natural interfere with the job market and the economy, but its use also has the potential to seriously degrade our culture as a whole. In combination with the uncertainty surrounding the increasing intelligence of machines, it is most assuredly better for the human species that technological progress be slowed so that we can, if necessary, prevent additional damage.

末段解析：進(jìn)一步說明減緩機(jī)器對人類影響的重要性，因?yàn)樵谖覀兊拿つ拷邮苤邢U伏這潛在的危險(xiǎn)。Blind acceptance呼應(yīng)首段的without caution and deliberation。記下來，not only…but句式用遞進(jìn)的方式進(jìn)一步說明對機(jī)器盲從的危害，從影響就業(yè)市場到整體文化衰退。最有一句仍然用一個(gè)表示條件的短語后，依然用了很強(qiáng)烈的措辭it is most assuredly better for the human species that句式再次犀利的重申自己的觀點(diǎn)，號(hào)召人們采取行動(dòng)。

小結(jié)：所以整體上感覺第二篇的力度強(qiáng)于第一篇，而且在遣詞造句方面第二篇也更顯功力。比如potential dangers，lurk，blind acceptance， degrade our culture，uncertainty surrounding等等。

關(guān)于ACT考試其他的疑問，歡迎【點(diǎn)擊此處】進(jìn)行詢問或撥打免費(fèi)熱線 400-618-8866 進(jìn)行詢問，我們將免費(fèi)為你解答你的疑惑。