雙語閱讀：兩招看穿英國人的“彬彬有禮”

英國人看似文質(zhì)彬彬，有時(shí)候卻能給人“致命一擊”。想想湯姆•希德勒斯頓（Tom Hiddlestone） 在電影《雷神》里的形象，或是阿倫•瑞克曼（Alan Rickman）飾演的所有角色——你會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)好萊塢電影特別熱衷于把禮貌的英國人塑造成神級(jí)惡棍。他們往往是笑面虎一樣的人，性格扭曲，常常笑嘻嘻地就把對(duì)手送進(jìn)了墳?zāi)�。禮儀是英國社會(huì)的粉飾劑和潤滑油。在局外人看來，每個(gè)英國人都儒雅斯文，富有人格魅力�？墒聦�(shí)并非如此。

SARCASM AND UNDERSTATEMENT

第一招：看穿諷刺(sarcasm)和輕描淡寫（understatement）

There are two principle methods by which a Brit can seem polite whilst meaning the opposite: with sarcasm and understatement. A cunning operator will be able to deploy both at the same time.

諷刺和輕描淡寫是英國人說話的兩種原則，通過這兩種方式，英國人可以做到表面很禮貌，內(nèi)心很狂躁。而狡猾的人往往會(huì)同時(shí)使用這兩種方法。

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For instance, I recently saw a sign on an umbrella rack that read: 'Could the gentleman who 'borrowed' a grey umbrella please return it at his earliest convenience. Thank you.' It is faultlessly polite, though of course what it really means is 'if you're the bloke who stole the umbrella, bring it back.'

舉個(gè)例子。我最近看到一個(gè)雨傘架上貼著一張便條，上面寫著：“那位‘借走了’一把灰色雨傘的先生，可否請(qǐng)您在方便的時(shí)候盡早還回來？萬分感謝。” 從表面上看，這句話禮貌得無懈可擊，可實(shí)際上寫便條的人是在叫囂：“喂，偷了傘的臭小子，快把傘還回來。”

The real meaning is obvious to any readers fluent in British politeness, and they won't be fooled by the techniques deployed. Firstly, there's the use of 'gentleman', subtle sarcasm as of course no real gentleman would ever pinch a brolly; indeed, no gentleman would leave the house without his own. Then there is the more obvious sarcasm of 'borrow' (indicated by the use of inverted commas). It would be coarse to mention theft, though of course it's what we're all thinking.

熟悉英式禮貌的人一眼就能看出這句話的玄機(jī)，再狡猾的掩飾也騙不了他們。首先，這句話微妙地諷刺偷傘者為“先生（gentleman）”，可真正的“先生”才不會(huì)偷傘，而且，沒有“先生”會(huì)不帶雨傘就出門。“借”字則是更明顯的諷刺了（而且還故意加上了引號(hào)）。赤裸裸地說“偷”畢竟太粗魯，不過即使是“借”字，作者的指責(zé)也不言而喻了。

The invitation to return the umbrella at 'earliest convenience' is again misleading – the notice demands nothing short of immediate return. Finally there is the inclusion of 'please' and 'thank you', which serve no function at all. This polite request is, when translated, a stern command: the chap who nicked the umbrella should be very scared indeed.

“方便時(shí)盡早還回來”也是話里有話——說白了就是敦促拿傘的人立馬歸還。最后，“請(qǐng)”和“萬分感謝”都是空話。這則禮貌的請(qǐng)求實(shí)際上是一種嚴(yán)厲的命令。那個(gè)順手牽羊的的小子看到這則告示應(yīng)該會(huì)汗毛豎起才對(duì)吧。

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FALSE APOLOGIES

第二招：聽懂虛假的道歉

The iconic British queue is rife with false politeness. A queue jumper is reviled, but will rarely be challenged. If confrontation is necessary, the correct form is to say 'I'm sorry, but I think I was in front of you'. This of course means 'get to the back’. Don't be fooled: 'I think' means 'I know'.

英國人以熱愛排隊(duì)而著名，這是他們彬彬有禮的一種表現(xiàn)。不過，排隊(duì)的過程中也充滿了“虛假的”英國式禮貌。插隊(duì)的人會(huì)被指責(zé)，但很少被叫板（因?yàn)槎Y貌嘛）。即便是正面交鋒，人們也只會(huì)說：“不好意思，我想我應(yīng)該是排在你前面的吧。”（看起來還是很禮貌）�？蓾撆_(tái)詞卻是：“滾到后面去。”

'I'm sorry' is included because the British cannot refrain from apologising in any marginal case. If in doubt it's best to apologise. If you bump into someone in the street, regardless of who's fault it is, it is rude not to say sorry. The same applies in road traffic accidents. A British apology is not by any means always sarcastic, even in the most extreme circumstances.

所以，不要被表象欺騙了，人家說“我想”的意思就是“我知道。”人家說“不好意思”只是因?yàn)榱?xí)慣了——英國人什么情況都離不開道歉，有任何疑問的時(shí)候先道歉就準(zhǔn)沒錯(cuò)。要是在街上撞到人，不管誰是誰非都要先道歉，不道歉就顯得粗魯了。路上的交通事故也一樣。不過，英國式道歉也不都像前面說的排隊(duì)那樣，充滿諷刺。即使在最極端的情況下，他們也忘不了道歉。詹姆士•邦德的塑造者伊恩•弗萊明，在臨終時(shí)對(duì)救護(hù)車上的醫(yī)務(wù)人員說：“給你們添麻煩了，實(shí)在抱歉。”

Ian Fleming, creator of James Bond, spoke his last words to the staff in the ambulance as they rushed him to hospital: 'I am sorry to trouble you chaps'. The British don't like to cause a scene, and this desire explains their polite approach to confrontation.

英國人不喜歡在公共場合大吵大鬧，因此他們面對(duì)沖突時(shí)也會(huì)禮貌應(yīng)對(duì)——雖然不一定是真的禮貌。 

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